Contemplation: Deep questions to ask yourself

To set the stage, I just realized I utilize type case for my blog headers and I’m actually not a fan of type case because it’s harder to read than sentence case. Also, the fact that I’m spending time contemplating this makes me wonder why I’m over analyzing it.

I’m just super excited because I’m currently waiting for the GOT season eight finale to start. I’m in California for work, so I’m two hours ahead of what I’m used to - meaning, I am staying up WAY past my bedtime and if I don’t put my energy into something besides waiting up for GOT, I will fall asleep.

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Do I like who I am right now?

No, that' is something I struggle with. I have a hard time being content. I’m always pushing myself to be better and I’m very critical of myself.

When was the last time I laughed hard?

I just Facetimed Brandon and I was giggling because he’s a big dork.

What would I truly regret not doing if I died tonight?

Staying up all night to tell everyone how much I love them and what I like about them. I always want people to know how much they mean to me, even if it is corny.

What advice has someone in my family given, and that I have taken just in time?

You get what you pay for.

What were the top three lessons I learned the hard way?

Don’t chase after boys.

You’ve gotta spend money to make money.

It’s all about perception.

What would I do with my remaining days if I had only a year left to live?

Enjoy the little things. Wake up and drink coffee on a front porch to slowly start my day. Kick my legs up and sit in front of the fire place. Kayak to the sunrise. Go on a long run. Cuddle. Play fetch with Manny.

Am I a servant of money, or does money serve me?

Money serves me. I read You are a Badass at Making Money and it completely changed my outlook on money. We typically associate money with bad things, but it’s not money that’s the problem - it’s power. Money will come and go.

Why am I afraid of being true to myself when others are around?

Depends on the circumstance. There’s a lot of times where I’d love to speak up, and I’m trying really hard to not be reactionary.

What are the three things that I am most grateful for?

Sight.

Ability to love/feel.

Ability to walk.

Have I done something recently that I could be proud of?

I managed to pack two week’s worth of clothes into a carry on and THAT is something I am extremely proud of. I’m spending two weeks away from home and it’s hard to not be in your comfort zone sometimes. I am proud of my adaptability.

When was the last time I extended kindness to somebody?

That’s a good question - it’s probably been awhile. The barista at Starbucks this morning when I asked “How are you?” said “I’m feeling like a million bucks and proud to work here today.” His response caught me off guard that he was so happy and passionate to work at Starbucks and make coffee. It made me wish I was more grateful and kind.

What question do I want to know the answer to if it will help humanity?

What is our purpose?

What do I really want from life?

Happiness.

What aspect of my personality still needs improvement?

I want to be more laid back and care free.

Must I take other people’s advice?

See, here’s the funny thing - I always ask for people’s advice, but I rarely take it.

What annoys me the most?

How much I can be so go with the flow and then in other scenarios, I’m very diplomatic.

Do others find me likeable?

Not sure. And I’d hate to say I don’t care, because sometimes, I think we should be aware of what other people think and have a pulse because perception does hold klout.

When was the last time I fell head over heels with life?

I should be more appreciative. I feel guilty that I can’t answer this question. I would like to say every day, and I need to get back into the swing of having that perception.

Am I enriching other people’s lives with what I do?

To be honest, I do not know. I really, really hope so. But, I don’t know that I am currently.

How meaningful is my life?

I believe my life is very meaningful.

What makes life meaningful?

People would be impacted if you were no longer in their lives. I’ve had people reach out to me years later to apologize, say they miss me or just reaching out to check in and I believe that shows that you are valued and your life has meaning - people care.

Would I lay down my life for somebody?

Absolutely.

How much money would I be willing to give to those in need if I won the lottery?

Brandon and I always talk about how we would divide up our winnings and what/who we’d give money to - it depends on the dollar amount.

Am I worthy of being loved?

Absolutely. It makes me sad that someone would think they weren’t worthy of receiving the type of love they need to thrive.

What talents/skills do I have that I can do better than anyone else?

Being mediocre - I’m excellent at being average.

What are things that put me off?

When people are not appreciative or are overly pretentious.

What is a peaceful life?

One where you can wake up every morning, not in a rush, and enjoy a cup of coffee while soaking in the weather.

What am I most afraid of about life?

Death. Getting divorced. Whether or not I’ll be a good parent.

Would I enjoy watching a movie made of my life?

Yes, in fact, sometimes when I listen to music, I can envision what the music video would look like, or how scenarios would look through a camera lens.

Is my definition of success the same as everyone elses?

What is success, really? We all try to accomplish success - but I think it needs to be more clearly defined. Plus, once I accomplish my goals, I create new ones.

Do I have a personal mission?

Yes, I want to change the world. I want to develop something or write something so profound that it can help just one person.

How would I describe the perfect day?

The perfect day is one where I can drink coffee outside and slowly start my day. Then, I go on a run or bike ride. If the weather’s nice, maybe even a hike. Take Manny on a walk. Cook lunch. Hang out with a group of friends. Lay in bed at night reflecting on how good the day was.

What am I willing to go the extra mile for?

My career - I push myself hard with work, education and professional development. I always go the extra mile for Brandon and I try really hard to go the extra mile for my friends and family.

What are my top five negative habits that I must change to something better?

-Drink less alcohol. Drink more water.

-Curse less. Praise more.

-Picking at blisters or calluses. Leave them alone.

-Spending money on food. Cook at home.

-Being lazy. Get up and move!

Who do I look up to?

I look up to my mom and my sisters. I look up to Brandon. I look up to a lot of my bosses that I’ve had. And, this is corny, but I admire Taylor Swift.

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